Just a little human touch…

“Sometimes I think I’m going mad
We’re loosing all we had and no one seems to care
But in my heart it doesn’t change
We’ve got to rearrange and bring our world some love.”

(Scorpions-“Under the same sun”)

Les Baux de Provence

-I missed this house! The colors, the smell…everything! Remember, Phillipe…

-How could i ever forget our first time? Princess…the way you gave yourself…abandoning your body completely in my arms…the sweet look in your eyes…the passion and the pleasure…i felt like the luckiest man on earth! And the best part is that…every time is better…every time i want you more and more…

-Phillipe…

-I adore you…look how cute you are when you’re blushing like this! And your eyes…when you’re happy they are sparkling! I feel like throwing you on the bed…i swear that your sexy smile make me loose my sense of reality…

I wrapped my arms around his neck, gently touching his face, arranging his careless hair.

-I love you…i wanna make love to you…but you said about a special dinner…and i’m starving!

He started to laugh.

-Alright…i guess i can wait a little more. Alicia, can you go to the kitchen and announce the servant to set the table?

-I rather not…that girl, Anette…i think she don’t like me…Why do you look at me like this? No, i’m not afraid! Alright…i’ll go!

a little later

-Mademoiselle want the dinner to be served now?

I looked at Anette. She seemed around 30, looking still very young. I asked myself why can’t she find a better place to work. Serving Phillipe…that must be hard…

-Yes. And, please, Anette, don’t call me “Mademoiselle”. I’m Alicia, or you can call me Ali, like all my friends. We’re the same age, i think…

-Excuse me, mademoiselle, i don’t have time to small talks…

-You don’t really like me, do you? It’s alright…at least let me help you arrange the table. Give me the salad…

The look in her eyes was more than the words could express. She took the salad boll out of my hands with harsh moves.

-No! Because I know how Sir prefer to have the dinner! I’m on his service long enough to know about his preferences! What did you imagined? You thought you can come here and ordering me like you’re the lady of the house? I only listen to Sir’s orders! Not to some spoiled girl! Yes…you thought that if you’re sleeping with him…

The door suddenly opened and i saw Phillipe standing there. And by his expression i understood that he heard it all….

-What’s going on here? You…girl…how dare you raise your voice to my fiancee? And offending her like you did…you should be on your knees bagging her to forgive you!

-I’m sorry, Sir, i’m truly sorry! I shouldn’t said, but i got mad because she wanted to arrange the dinner table and i know you like it in a certain way. I promise you, Sir, this will never happen again!

-Did i gave you permission to speak?

His eyes were so cold and his calm seemed to hide an anger beyond humanly understanding. He looked at Anette like he just saw a trash.

-Pack your things. In 15 minutes i want you out of this house. And do not dare to look in my eyes ever again! Or to speak to my fiancee who, by the way, is the lady of the house! Now, get your garbage out of my house!

I saw her standing there, looking hurt but trying to keep her dignity. And suddenly something snapped inside of her mind and i was horrified to see her kneeling in front of him…

-Please, Sir…i bag you…i’ll do whatever it takes…i’ll work harder and i’ll never do that again. Please…it’s late…i have no place to go and you know about my mother…she’s sick…Please Sir…

-Well…you should had thought about your mother before! You only have 5 minutes left to leave this house! Start packing. Now!

I looked at him…how cold and cruel sounded his words.

-Phillipe…she’s on her knees…it’s not right…do something. Look, i already forgot what she said…it doesn’t matter and i’m sure she’ll try…

He interrupted me with a firm voice.

-Alicia, please go upstairs and wait for me there. You’re oversensitive about these things! And i don’t want you to mix with servants…ever again. OK, baby? Go upstairs…

I left the room feeling so sad…I heard her crying and i imagined how she must feel. And then, i saw her living the house and i couldn’t resist anymore. Running down the stairs…trying my best to catch her before she’ll go into the darkness…

-Anette…wait!

-What is it? You’re happy now? You wanna take a good look at me just to enjoy the view?

-No…let me help you! Here…take this money…it’s all i have now. You said you have no place to go…this will help you to pay a room at a hotel. And here’s my phone number…Please, call me…i have some friends and i think i can get you a new job. Please, Anette…let me help you…

She took the money and, for the first time, she looked at me friendly.

-Alicia…Ali…thank you! I…i don’t know what to say except that…i’m extremely sorry! I was horrible to you, and you were nothing but kind…I’ll call you…

I opened my arms and gave her a big warm hug, thinking how wrong can we act out of prejudices…And then, i turned back to the house.

a little later

-so…princess…you gave her all of your money…and you promised her a job…

-yep!

-and you left the house without saying a word to me…just to help a stranger. Of course…not any stranger…someone who offended you…

-again…yep!

-Are you out of your mind, Alicia? I’m serious now! Tell me exactly what’s going on in that beautiful head of yours!

-I don’t know, Phillipe…but i’ll tell you what’s in my heart and soul…When i saw her kneeling in front of you, my heart broke. It was the saddest thing i ever saw…and any offending word she might told me…it didn’t matter anymore. I felt like she’s loosing her dignity, her pride…

-Baby, servants are not supposed to have dignity and pride! She’s not the first woman kneeling in front of me or bagging…I love you, Alicia, but you need to learn to behave…because your admiration…your fascination toward people will cause you many problems. This need of yours to help and love them…why don’t you understand? They don’t deserve it! I’m the only one you should love and respect! And it’s the last time when i allow you to do something like this…

-You’re the only one i love and respect…Phillipe…can we be like…before? Can you hold me and make me feel loved and protected again? I feel so lonely and sad…i wanna cry and i have no more tears…I’m afraid to talk to you, to tell you how i feel…and i’m afraid to be myself…can you love me like before? Without all those cruel words…

He smiled at me and took me in his arms.

-My beauty…no more cruel words. I don’t wanna hurt you…sometimes i feel like you’re just a big child, completely blind to the darkness of this world. How could i be ever mad at you…when all i want is to make love to you…i never loved anybody like i love you…

Maybe i’m blind to the darkness around me. Or maybe…i just see the light in places where the others renounced long time ago to search it. The lost causes…how could i ever turn my back? If there’s a chance, just a little one, to turn someone’s life into better…how could i walk away without trying? How could anybody…

because i just feel i’m a lost cause myself…

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