I was once like you are now…

“But take your time, think a lot

Think of everything you’ve got,

For you’ll still be here tomorrow

But your dreams may not…”

(R. Keating-“Father and son”)

Sometimes, people are like songs…the good ones never get old. There are rythms that could last only a summer, but what a lovely summer…And songs that can last a lifetime and they keep comming back to your heart when you least expect it…

It was one of those days when everything you do is not enough…The foto shooting went from bad to worst, like a never ending nightmare. Of course, when i said that nothing can go wrong anymore, one of the models just had a nervous breakdown. Enough is enough i said to myself, looking at the sunny sky…And in the middle of this desaster, i fund myself smilling. Thinking of that beautiful stranger from my virtual world…

-You seems so distracted today…noticed Peter as we were driving home

-Not really, just a little tired (and sad, and sick, and bored, and annoyed…), i think i need a break…

-A break? But you never stop…and, by the way, is a long time since i saw you so relaxed during a crisis situation…

(I don’t care…i wish i could runn away…i’m always so damn strong that some day i might believe my own lies…)

My silence made him realise that i wasn’t even listening to him. He looked at me with a shocked expression:

-I’m starting to believe that you think of someone else…You’re so absent that i may think you’re inlove. Some avatar from that stupid game? You’re tired because you hang out with those…never mind. I know exactely what you need: shopping…Let’s go and find some nice things to wear…

He stoped the car. Loosing myself in the crowd was really helpfull. Maybe he’s right…this is my life, forget all and go shopping…

I bought two lovely dresses, the textures like silk, the colors looked natural and it felt so good talking, smilling, concentrating on simple things. I was about to leave the mall, when i could feel that someone is watching me. Instinctively i turned my had on that direction. A nice old woman (or should i say, a lady) was looking on my dresses, on me, back on my dresses…I smiled at her, encouraging her to come closer.

-My dear, how are you going to wear those dresses? They reveal a lot…You know, some things you better keep for your man…

I smiled again, while she continued:

-You look like a model, maybe not so skinny like the fashion demands (she’s right! i don’t have the anorexic look). I was one too, in my youth years (yes, her features were still beautifull, regardless the years). Beauty is not forever…you, youngs, talk about having fun all the time, when you’ll be like me this fun will be so meanningless…If you got a good man, keep him, start a family with him…look at my son, still single…

Someone interrupted her, taking her gently by her shoulders. Could he be the single son of her’s? i asked myself still fascinated by the speach…

-Please, excuse my mother, i hope she was not disturbing too much…it’s a delicate age…sometimes she say upsetting things, but she has a good heart…

I assured him that speaking to his mother was interesting and refreshing. They left, saying good bye in a perfect british way…

And for a moment, i though about the choices i made so far…wishing i could have them both: a ballad for a lifetime and the rythm from a lovely summer…

Maybe you’re just blind…

“Well, somewhere in this darkness there’s a light that i cant see,

Maybe its too far away

Or maybe i’m just blind…”

(3 Doors Down-“Love me when i’m gone”)

The yellow light from the 2’nd floor was so bright, suggesting that Peter was reading something. He always had this habbit of reading till late in the night, and then falling asleep on that couch…My favourite part of the house was a small room, more a bedroom then anything else, with nothing but a big and confortable bed, big windows and a scent of roses…Yes, it brings back all those sweet memories from our first month of relationship…Now, after few years, this room was not used anymore…

I layed on the bed, dreaming away, my laptop next to me. I was going to check my emails when i remenbered (with a sad smile) that talk from my office, about Second Life. The account was created, i just needed 10 minutes to choose an avatar and start playing. The game seemed easy to me, all intuitive…My avatar looked gothic, pale, big black eyes on white skin…nothing attractive about her. My ego was shouting out loud, i couldn’t play that way…The minutes just went by, a half hour, a whole hour and the avatar looked completely changed. And choosing clothes, what a joke, i do that all the time…is boring this game, i said to myself…

-Honey, i’m going to bed, are you coming too? You’re working at this hour?! Peter was standing in front of me, his blonde hair looking sand-colour in the pale light. He was an atractive man, looking more like 35 than over 40, with his dark blue eyes and that sexy smile.

-It’s not work, i heard about a game and i was trying to see how is it…i said trying to look as innocent as i could be. Nothing important, i’ll come in a minute.

-Let me see that game…(at this point i think i was blushing a little), so…you play Second Life?

-I just started, is a funny game with funny avatars. Some of them were writting to me, they are all nice telling me wellcome…

-I know all about that. Liz (my friend from the office) was calling me today to tell me that you’re about to do a foolish thing…

-Like playing a computer game? God, Peter, you dont mean that, right? She’s messed up with that stupid cyber-love of hers, i said furious. Anyway, i’ll talk to her, he’s unbelievable calling you like that…

-So, you didn’t even thought about having a relationship there, right, honey?

-Not in a million years, you’re all i need, i said smilling at him and running my fingers thru my hair (i knew that he can’t resist me when i do that). Look, if that’s a problem for you, i’ll just close my account. But it will be a shame, i didn’t even had the chance to see how to play this…

-No, it’s ok, you should at least check on that game…

-And you wont be jelous if i talk to another man? Or if i dance with him? It could be pretty romantic, i said, teasing him. Maybe you should make sure that i’ll be faithfull…i said pulling his body closer to mine’s and letting my dress slipping down on the flour…

-Aly, you know about the casting…I’ll get up early in the morning to arrange that location. It was a hard day…just come and get some sleep.

-Sure, just 10 minutes more…i said hiding my dissapointment. You go ahead…

-Good night…and, Alicia, i meanted what i said about Second Life, just dont do anything stupid there…

And i didn’t…What seemed to be a game, it’s actually a wonderfull adventure into a virtual world, a world made by human imagination and build on hopes, dreams and expectations. When words are all you have, you have more that you may think…And i’m here to tell you my story, my journey into a imaginary place, a place that can change real lifes…

(to be continued)